May 20, 2011

Anger management 101

Whether Im simply too bored or I think about too much stuff lately, I dont know. But like it or not, I tend to be that emo kid you see in typical English movies with black eyeliner siting at the corner thinking everything in life suck. Yup thats me in this past few days. *Eh2 dramatik pulak engkau* Takde lah. Saje bikin cerita gempak. Tapi tu lah. Aku asek rasa nak menyumpah je lately. Tp dalam hati la. Sebab dalam hati tu la yang rasa lagi penat. Takde bahan nak disembur. Duk membara2 dalam hati je. Apekahhh?? Haihs

Ok2 so here are a few tips for emo kids (like moi) out there on how to deal with your anger. Ala2 bukak kelas giteww..

1 - Say nothing

As simple as it sounds. When you speak with anger you will definitely aggregate the situation and worser you might hurt the feelings of others. Betul la kan. Cuba kalau time tu kau tengah berapi, agak2 apa yang keluar dari mulut tu. Tak ke macam mulut naga kan. Abeh kau bakor orang keliling. Orang yang bagi respon baik kat kita pun otomatikly kita rasa benda tu negatif. So cara paling baik kita diam je. Being silent doesnt mean you lose. It gives time for you anger to leave you.

" When angry count to ten before you speak. If very angry, count to one hundred. "

2 - Be indifferent

Kadang2 memang wujud orang2 yang suka buat orang lain marah. Dialog dia lebih kurang cam ' lu ni saje bikin wa panas la bro! '. Kann.. Tak pun cam kata pepatah tu, bagai mencurah minyak ke dalam api. Memang ada makhluk macam ni. They find it pleasurable when they got people mad. However, if you can feel indifferent to them and their words then their words and actions will have no effect on you. One of the best thing is to feel like it is beyond your dignity to even notice them. Kau abaikan je dia nyah! Kalau hidup ni macam Facebook, kira kau pergi kat edit friends, kau tekan butang  remove, hilanglah dia dari hidup kau. Abes ceghite! Tak pun kalau they start to be provoking, kau buat bodoh je. Yes it is hard. But trust me. One way or another, they will start lose interest and leave you alone. 

3 - Excuse yourself

Yang ini pun penting. Agak2 bila kau rasa anger is coming your way try to take a step back. Use any reason in the world to excuse yourself. Like "Ahh! Tak ke mana pun kalau aku menyampah ngan kau, pakcik auto! Aku cakap Melayu kau cakap bahasa kels kau. Bazir karen je. Huh!". Even if there's a small pint of anger remain in your heart, your inner voice is helping distant you away front the emotion.

4 - Value peace

You have every right to be angry to someone,  but dont you know by getting angry with that person you will only lose one peace of mind. Islam pun sangat tekankan kedamaian dalam apa jua aspek kehidupan. Janganlah nak duk gaduh2 lagi2 kalau benda tu small matter je. So cintailah kedamaian ye kawan2..

5 - Try to understand

Try to understand those wo crossed your line. Dont worry about the feeling the need to defend youself. Mungkin dia pun tak sengaja buat kita marah ke, we cant say. If you remain calm and detached, they begin to feel guilty about what they did. Diorang sendiri akan tersedar apa diorang dah buat. They can get inspired by your example of your calmness. Subconsciously diorang pun boleh boleh terikut sama dengan cara kita.

6 - Distract yourself

Suppose someone has made you angry, focus yourself on something that makes you happy. Let it be anything, if you feel like baking, dancing, shopping then just go with it. Teringat pulak zaman kat SESERI dulu. Cikgu disiplin ktorg, Miss Maria, penah nasihat kat ktorg time tengah stress nak SPM, "ngkorang kalau dah tension sangat pergi sental baju kat bilik basuh. Kau bayangkan muka sape2 kau tak suka kat baju tu  kau tenyeh puas2. Baju pun basuh, hati pun senang." 

7 - Breathe deeply

The simple act of breathing will help considerably with romoving your anger.

8 - Smile

When we smile it defuse many negative situations. It helps. Plus it costs you nothing but effectively kurangkan ketegangan. Senyum sokmo ler!

9 - Come near to earth
Just like the electricty, we have to channel it down to earth. Our anger is also some kind of a current carrying high voltage energy. It is said that bila kita marah dan time tu tengah berdiri, duduklah. Kalau tengah duduk, baringlah. Come near to earth as we are all have been made of earth. Hence make yourself calm like the earth.

10 - Wudhu'

Rasulullah S.A.W bersabda yang mafhumnya : ”Dari ‘Atiah ia berkata , Rasulullah S.A.W bersabda ” Sesungguhnya marah itu daripada syaitan dan syaitan itu diciptakan daripada api dan sesungguhnya api itu terpadam dengan air, maka apabila salah seorang dari kamu marah, maka hendaklah ia berwuduk”. ( Riwayat Abu Daud)



WORLD PEACE! *wink*

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